During training exercises, the lieutenant driving down a muddy back road encountered another car stuck in the mud with a red faced colonel at the wheel.
“Your jeep stuck, sir?”
asked the lieutenant as he pulled alongside.
“Nope,” replied the colonel, coming over and handing him thekeys, “*Yours* is.”
The new Ensign was assigned to subs, where he’d dreamed of working since a young boy.
He was trying to impress the Master Chief with his expertise learned in Sub School.The Master Chief cut him off quickly and said, “Listen, ’sir’,it’s real simple.
Add the number of times we dive to the number of times we surface.
Divide that number by two. If the result doesn’t come out even, don’t open the hatch.”
It was a dark, stormy, night.
The Marine was on his firstassignment, and it was guard duty.A General stepped out taking his dog for a walk.
The nervousyoung Private snapped to attention, made a perfect salute,and snapped out “Sir, Good Evening, Sir!”
The General, out for some relaxation, returned the saluteand said “Good evening soldier, nice night, isn’t it?”
Well it wasn’t a nice night, but the Private wasn’t going todisagree with the General, so the he saluted again andreplied “Sir, Yes Sir!”
.The General continued, “You know there’s something about astormy night that I find soothing, it’s really relaxing.Don’t you agree?”
The Private didn’t agree, but them the private was just aprivate, and responded “Sir, Yes Sir!”
The General, pointing at the dog, “This is a Golden Retriever,the best type of dog to train.”
The Private glanced at the dog, saluted yet again and said”Sir, Yes Sir!”
The General continued “I got this dog for my wife.”
The Private simply said “Good trade Sir!”
